NOMINATIONS: Films in desperate need of a high-quality remake...

I'm sure this is a topic that's been explored many times on the old Forum, but this time, it's with a twist: I'd like to start collecting nominations for a new AlternaFantaverse Poll, with the thought that, somewhere down the road, one or more of we aspiring multimedia titans might take on the challenge of penning a new script for said title.

It can be a film property, a television series, a foreign film, whatever. One rule, tho: the original has to be more than ten years old. Oh, and another rule: it can't already be in development (or else Logan's Run, Otherworld, Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, Robotech and V would be pretty damned high on my list).

I personally have been thinking about this for quite some time. Here, in ascending order of awesomeness, are five titles I think DESERVE, nay, DEMAND a decent remake:

[5-tie] Space: Above and Beyond (needs a new title, tho) and Silent Running
[4] Firefox
[3] The Six Million Dollar Man (to be rechristened, Six Billion Dollar Man)
[2] The Day After
[1] The Black Hole

Let's see what other ideas we can get, and in a few weeks we'll have a poll. Then see if anyone wants to take it on.


Can you hear me?

disclaimer: i'm not suggesting that any of these movies need a haphazard half-assed money-grubbing remake (i'm looking at you, death race!!). i'm just saying that each of these could possibly benefit from modern aesthetics in the hands of somebody who truly appreciates the source material..

Vanishing Point
Westworld (this one has had a false start or two... i don't know if it'll ever happen)
Martin
Dutchman
Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia
Zardoz
A Boy and His Dog
Picnic at Hanging Rock
April Fool's Day
Of Unknown Origin

I personally think the only films that should be remade are foreign films so they can be done with big budgets, actors I recognize, and most importantly, no reading

I remember hearing something about a Six Billion Dollar Man remake in the works with Jim Carrey. It was a comedy version - actually I think it was called Six Thousand Dollar Man or something like that. Basically, a what if the government got cheap as hell.

Or was that a Family Guy joke?

I'm so confused.

geezer9687 wrote:I personally think the only films that should be remade are foreign films so they can be done with big budgets

generally, i agree.. but there are movies that are simply victims of their time.. great ideas overshadowed by the dated appearance of their presentation..

the general mediocrity of remakes has left a bad taste in all of our mouths, but the idea of creating new appeal for classic ideas isn't inherently a bad thing

BanksIsDaFuture wrote:I remember hearing something about a Six Billion Dollar Man remake in the works with Jim Carrey. It was a comedy version - actually I think it was called Six Thousand Dollar Man or something like that. Basically, a what if the government got cheap as hell.

Or was that a Family Guy joke?

I'm so confused.

It was going to be "The Six Million Dollar Man" or "The Bionic Man" and I ,personally, was pissed at the casting of Carey as it appeared that a comedic approach was going to be taken. Thankfully it was dropped, however, there may never be a film due to rights of the characters and rights of the original story were split up a few years back. It's the reason you cannot purchase the TV series in the US. I have a Region free DVD player and have considered getting a foreign version of the show but haven't as of yet.

It was great to see The Six Million Dollar Man nominated/reccommended for a remake. I had indeed mentioned it on a thread at the old site. I guess the first film would have to deal with main character development, but if there was a sequel I would want to see the "Bigfoot" storyline pursued. Cheesy..but in a fun kinda way. And then the Bionic Woman and The Bionic Dog (MAX I think). Oh the money that could be made if it were done right.

geezer9687 wrote:I personally think the only films that should be remade are foreign films so they can be done with big budgets, actors I recognize, and most importantly, no reading

I think all Hollywood movies should be remade and spoken in pretty much every foreign language EXCEPT English, eliminating all English speaking movies entirely (and probably retiring some of the worst actors of our generation) and forcing everyone to read subtitles. Especially any film you like Geez. Imagine The Terminator in Japanese, V For Vendetta in Russian, Indiana Jones in Swahili.

I still think Face/Off would be ripe for a good remake, a sort of future-noir thriller. You know, without the ridiculous explosions and laughable performances.

four words.


Clash of the Titans.

Donte77 wrote:four words.


Clash of the Titans.

Er.. isn't that one already in progress? (it came up in a Louis Leterier discussion back on the old FM)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0800320/

Erm... Infernal, me bukki, I know your brain's friend by Spannaus' diabolical helicopter game subliminable mind control ap, but you missed a step when reading the "rules" of this game. Clash of the Titans is currently being remade (by Lawrence Kasdan no less), with a budget hovering somewhere around $100M, for an anticipated Holiday 2010 release. So far, Sam Worthington (of the forthcoming Terminator Salvation) is the only confirmed talent. WB and Legendary are co-financing and will distribute.

I just hope "the loudest band in the world," Manowar, does the music (and that longtime cover artist Ken Kelly does the poster art).


"THIS... IS... ARGOS!!!"

ETA: Erm, yeah, what she said. [Grin]

What I'd give for a main of hair like that....



Did I say that aloud.

The Cable Guy
Arsenic and Old Lace
Tormented

Citizen Kane
The Seven Samurai
To Kill a Mockingbird
Das Boot
2001: A Space Odyssey
The Wizard of Oz
Ben-Hur
The Graduate
Frankenstein

geezer9687 wrote:Citizen Kane
The Seven Samurai
To Kill a Mockingbird
Das Boot
2001: A Space Odyssey
The Wizard of Oz
Ben-Hur
The Graduate
Frankenstein

They were all a joke, right.....

Yes and No... It started that way... but then I started actually thinking about it...

geezer9687 wrote:Citizen Kane
The Seven Samurai

If they even thought about it I would start murdering people.

I did not know that they were doing CofT. That is awesome. I just finally got the movie on DVD after having owned it on VHS for a decade and a half.

Dude the Medusa bleeding lava and the fucking Kraken. Yeah!!!!! And Calibos would look spectacular.

Here is my casting.
They have this Saw Worthington dude cast but I think Gerard Butler or Jeffrey Dean Morgan as Perseus.
Amanda Seyfried as Andromeda. (damn she is hot)
Someone like Cilian Murphy for Calibos. Or maybe Ray Steveson if they want him more gruff.
Zeus should be Ian Mckellan or Ian Holm. Maybe Michael Gambon if he is done playing Dumbledore.

Medusa and Kraken as all digital FX.

silversurfer19 wrote:

geezer9687 wrote:I personally think the only films that should be remade are foreign films so they can be done with big budgets, actors I recognize, and most importantly, no reading

I think all Hollywood movies should be remade and spoken in pretty much every foreign language EXCEPT English, eliminating all English speaking movies entirely (and probably retiring some of the worst actors of our generation) and forcing everyone to read subtitles. Especially any film you like Geez. Imagine The Terminator in Japanese, V For Vendetta in Russian, Indiana Jones in Swahili.

I wouldn't care. Honestly it wouldn't even phase me. These films would all die on Arrival in America and I would never have to think about them. It would actually be good. Because then the native speaking people of those countries could watch the movie and enjoy it in their own language, while I can still watch and love the originals. I don't see why people have such uproar over remakes. Newsflash: You Don't Have to Watch It. It's not like they are saying, "This is now the only version of the film, we have acquired all copies of the other version and will be burning them at the premier." If you don't like when they remake your films, don't see it, and watch your original in all of its glory. That's exactly what I would do if they started remaking my favorites in foreign languages.

Citizen Kane
The Seven Samurai
To Kill a Mockingbird
Das Boot
2001: A Space Odyssey
The Wizard of Oz
Ben-Hur
The Graduate
Frankenstein

Dude... Really? I mean, REALLY?

Kane? Kurosawa? Boot? Ben? For the love of all that's holy, 2001?

Why, oh, why mess with perfection? Might as well toss Star Wars, Dances With Wolves, Last of the Mohicans, Heat and A Christmas Story on the pile, too... But I draw the line at Starship Troopers, really I do.

I never liked The Graduate, so I could give a damn about remaking it. Hell, why not just do a sequel? Call it The Post-Graduate.

Never cared much for The Wizard of Oz, either, though I suspect that eventually Tim Burton and Johnny Depp will get around to it. Depp can be the Wizard.

A remake of To Kill A Mockingbird is fine with me, though wholly unnecessary imho. Frankenstein's sure due, and, what do you know, it's being prepped for a 2012 release by someone or other. I wish it was Pixar, with Andrew Stanton (director of Finding Nemo, Wall-E, and the forthcoming John Carter of Mars) helming.

A cast for Clash of the Titans, hm, let me think about that one.


Don't diggle with Nazi Doogie

Well, like I said, it started as a joke. But I think if done well, any of those films could be made. I have not seen all of them, or even a majority of them, but that is my point. Its not like they are going to be re-released anytime soon. So what would be so wrong with doing a remake that honored the original and would expose an entire new generation of fans to the film's concept. I think it would be a much better option than just recycling the material into a half-assed film that just rips off elements of the originals like 95% of the films out there today. And like I said, making a re-make has no affect on the original film. If anything, it would just make you appreciate the original film more.

Edit: One important stipulation, Tim Burton is not allowed to do any of said remakes. He would just take the source material, and turn it into something that would only be good if you dropped acid before seeing it.

geez: How dare you make sense when I'm brimming with irrational emotionality! Damn... you, Spock! ...Damn... you!

[Siiigh...] Yes, of course you're right, any of these films CAN be remade, and it would be nice to see them (re)made WELL... I'm just hidebound, and hate to see resources squandered re-doing something that's already pretty damned awesome, in some cases, even bordering on PERFECT. I've seen far too many piss-poor remakes, retreads and retcons to be optimistic about this (ha, take THAT, Infernal!), despite the very occasional emergence of a higher-end regurgitation like Silence of the Lambs or Thomas Crown Affair or Ocean's 11 or War of the Worlds or Batman Begins.

Case in point: Fantastic Voyage, due to be released Summer 2010, directed by Roland Emmerich. Sure, the 1966 film is pretty dated, and there's no question but that modern fx could really make it a spectacular experience. The original cast was serviceable but not stellar, and although Raquel Welch was certainly the very best special effect the original, Star Trek-era title could boast of, there's no shortage of hot babes out there who would suceed her quite nicely (may I recommend Jennifer Garner?) But I just dread what might result: Journey 3-D meets A&E's epically worthless Andromeda Strain update.

...But, again, I'm an old fart, and jealous of my youthful favorites, and find I'm losing patience with a generation of filmmakers and financiers who don't give a damn for quality film, they just want to take the title and slap together an excuse for spending millions of dollars to update their résumés. Piss on all of 'em.


Doctor Coolio finds paradise inside a gansta's body in Fantastic Voyage 2: Electric Boogaloo, featuring the Grammy Award-winning single, "My Heart Will Go On (Inside Yours)"

Cannibal: The Musical (basically the same film but with a bigger budget)

I think more money and Cannibal would just be putting a shiny new chrome job on a perfectly edible block of tasty cheese.

I think more money and Cannibal would just be putting a shiny new chrome job on a perfectly edible block of tasty cheese.

I honestly can't figure what the Hell you're getting at, here, Infernal. Does that mean you're for it, or against it?


Please deposite an additional 75 cents for an outside chance at gaining my actual attention

Against. My metaphor was that more money would ruin the originality and the barely IFC-ish feel of that movie. Chrome on cheese just ruins the cheese and the chrome would be a puddle of shiny stuff.