Your Worst Movie Theatre Experiences

I bet that we have these all of the time and usually they can be annoying. Sometimes scary, sometimes sickening, even sometimes cute, but usually they are annoying. Earlier I published some links about people and their worst movie theatre experiences but no one seemed to find the time or interest that I seemed to have in reading them. So I'm going to let you talk about your worst experiences and I'll even mention a few and add the stories of some people from the links I provided.

Does anyone want to share?

1) I went to see King Kong on it's opening day, just before the film started a guy walked in with his 6-ish year old kid. Now, i'm not one of those people who hates kids at the movies, but King Kong had some pretty intense scenes. The beginning is downright freaky, and the action scenes are scary for the little ones.

Anyway, the kid gets visibly freaked out in the beginning, but then calms down.. However, when KK appears and goes on his rampage the kid was actually crying.. I wasn't so much pissed at the crying as i was at the dad who was sitting there going 'shhh you're ruining the movie'.. It was fucking pathetic.

I told him to take his kid outside so he could calm down.. and he told me to mind my own business in.. erm.. 'french'... I was pissed and nearly picked a fight with him but someone had already called one of the people working there and they asked him to leave and gave him free tickets.. On his way out he actually said this to the kid; "you happy now? you got us kicked out of the fucking movie.." The kid was actually crying so much he was finding it hard to breathe... Some people shouldn't be allowed to have kids..

2) I went to an 11:30pm showing of Casino Royale. Mind you, this is opening weekend, it's Saturday, the place is packed, and if the movie is starting at 11:30 then you know it's gonna run late.

This time, a whole family comes walking in; Dad, Mom, teen-ish girl, and little baby. It was fucking stupid. Why would ANYONE bring a baby to an 11.30pm showing of an action movie that is going to have loud noises. Anyway, as soon as those loud noises began the baby got restless and started crying.. The father takes the kid and goes and stands in a corner and tries to sing it to sleep.. Like standing in a corner is going to stop the baby from crying or us from hearing it.. Anyway, a few minutes later the mother starts talking to the baby in a loud loud voice, and then someone from the audience stands up and says "why'd you bring your baby BITCH!"... he actually got a good old fashioned round of applause, and the family left.

i think that simply having seen the Brown Bunny in the theater trumps any tale of bad service, noisy children, or broken projectors..

Where I come from, people usually don't take their small children to PG-13 or R rated movies late (since the most popular theatre in the area has a no children under 5 policy after 6:00 pm on those and most people follow that), but I'll give you some scattered memories of not very good and some bad experiences.

-The film breaking at a showing of Garfield. It was opening day and the theatre was full. The restless audience has to wait and we missed the first five minutes, but all was well, the rest of the film played fine and we (my mother and I) got passes for another time (we ended up seeing The Stepford Wives two weeks later on them).
-The film breaking at a showing of The Brothers Solomon. There was a very sparse crowd (after all, it was The Brothers Solomon) and the showing almost got canceled due to the difficulty with the projector and the small crowd. Finally, the film started 35 minutes late and near the end of the film...THE ADS CAME ON WHILE THE FILM ITSELF WAS STILL RUNNING! There was nothing we could really do about it since the ad projector is timed to do that but at least we got to see the whole thing. In the end, we got passes and used them to see the awful Mr. Woodcock. The whole projector mess and 35 minutes of blank screen was still more entertaining than any of Mr. Woodcock.
-Going to a special showing of Labyrinth and having the projector break before the movie was even to start. I ended up getting a refund and later that day, I saw Man On Wire at another theatre.
-Seeing people take small children to these films:
The Missing (crying baby), Land Of The Dead, A History Of Violence (but it was only during the climax, the ultra-violent climax in Cronenberg's own graphic style), Clerks II (a newborn with its young and irresponsible parents but at least the baby was quiet), Flags Of Our Fathers, Halloween, Rambo (those kids thought it was the best movie ever though) and probably several others.
-Had projection problems at a showing of Bewitched where the picture would not stop bouncing up and down. They had to stop the projector six or seven times just to fix it and we didn't even get a refund that shitfest. A few months later, I went to a showing of Prime at the same theatre and they stopped and restarted the projector twice during the previews for some strange reason. It apparently didn't work because the movie (also a bad film) had boom mikes in every other shot. It soon became more fun to play "spot the boom mike" than to actually watch the movie.
-Sharing an auditorium running Just Married with a mentally-challenged person who apparently had seen the movie before as she was shouting dialogue at the screen as if this Ashton Kutcher film was The Rocky Horror Picture Show. I hated watching the film with the lady but my mother and sister were amused.
-Seeing the movie Jumper in Alton, Illinois with an on-duty cop who kept coming in and out having conversations with a number of teens in the audience...even the kids he kicked out of the theatre that kept coming back into the theatre while they were waiting for their parents to come pick them up. Earlier in the night, the guy attempted to kick me out for sneaking (I was killing time watching previews) but I had my ticket stub and all was fine. But Alton, Illinois is still a weird town.

More to come.

NSpan wrote:i think that simply having seen the Brown Bunny in the theater trumps any tale of bad service, noisy children, or broken projectors..

I saw 9 Songs with my friend, and apart from us there was three elderly couples (2 of which walked out), and a group of teens.

take THAT!

Went to see Vantage Point at a 9.15pm showing, and as we were sitting there going through the usual adverts and trailers and what not, we noticed they kept repeating, some dude at the front got up and mentioned it 2 the staff so they decided to play it all over again. Finally after watching the same trailers 3 times running the film starts playing but THE WRONG FILM!!!. They offered us a refund or to wait while they swap the reel over, so by the time the film started it was bout 10.30pm and to top it all off the last 15 mins of the film had a blue line right through the middle of it .

Man, speaking of bringing kids to inappropriate movies, I've seen tots and babies at the most random movies ever, including the following: Saw 3-5, Halloween, Rambo, Watchmen, The Last House on The Left, Hostel Part 2, The Hills Have Eyes 2, Knocked Up, No Country For Old Men, There Will Be Blood, The Reader, Before The Devil Knows You're Dead, The Strangers, AVP:R, Zach & Miri Make A Porno, etc.

I once built half of a movie backwards. Luckily, I screened it and was at work until 3 AM re-doing it. But, I got paid for more hours so I was actually happy to do that.

Numerous times I've seen people having sex. I wouldn't say "caught" since I usually let it go if the theater is empty. But sometimes, if I'm bored, I'll turn up the lights to cleaning level (bright as shit) and laugh while they look around in confusion and fall over themselves either zipping up or putting clothes back on. But the best time I've seen sex was during National Treasure 2. There was about 5 people in there in the first or second row, then there's two teens having sex COMPLETELY NAKED in the back row with all the armrests up so it was like a bed. Me and two other people who worked there watched as they switched positions from missionary to doggystyle to finally girl on top. Eventually, the girl saw us watching because she was facing the booth window. The shame made them stop and leave, but not without us laughing at them while they dressed.

I've never had any problems while actually watching a movie, except for old men during Rush Hour 3 and Fred Claus who were by themselves and laughed at EVERYTHING, and the one in Fred Claus had the funniest laugh ever. People were laughing at him laughing at the movie more than the movie itself.

BarcaRulz wrote:On his way out he actually said this to the kid; "you happy now? you got us kicked out of the fucking movie.."

Greatest. Parent. Ever.

I also saw people bring small children to Watchmen. And not long before seeing the film, I heard a radio entertainment reporter mention that you shouldn't bring children to see it due to the dark nature and the R rating.

I also remember seeing the awful My Bloody Valentine remake the day it opened and noticed that a father was taking his five-year old son to the showing after mine.

More experiences, such as:
-Seeing the first few minutes of The Pebble and The Penguin without sound. A lot of the audience (parents mainly) seemed to be going apeshit until the thing was fixed.
-Going to see Treasure Planet, being seated more than a half hour before showtime only to realize that the movie had already started way ahead of its start time. I had to ask a manager if there was a mix-up with the auditoriums (it was playing on two screens at the time) but they realized their mistake, pulled off the movie and had to restart it at the right time. I may have pissed off a few people but at least most of the people that came later didn't have to come at the scheduled time only to see that half of the movie had already elapsed.
-When I went to see the snowboarding documentary First Descent (which had the distinction as being the only film produced by a soft drink company), I had to share the auditorium with two skateboarder emo punks were talked and laughed really stupidly during the trailers. When the trailers ended, I asked them nicely to be quiet. About a minute later, they actually hit me with a spitwad. Realizing what they did (and with the spitwad actually being pretty dry), I threw the spitwad back at them and went the bathroom to thoroughly wash my hands. Finally, they walked out halfway through the film and rode off on their skateboards.
-When I went to an advance screening of Shrek The Third, I was really happy to be at the first screening and rocking the then-new rocking chairs at the theatre. Suddenly, some big fat guy wearing a huge belt buckle comes barging in after the previews start and sits right behind me, being a jackass. My mother tells me not to rock so hard but I ignore her because I love the chairs so much. Finally, the guy rudely asks my mother if I am "special" or something. I get angry and leave that seat and sit up front because I'm angry at the guy. At least Eric Idle's Merlin character made me feel better.

And of course, I've gone to various horror/thriller movies where half of the audience consists of dumb teenagers heckling the movies and the other half consists of people just wanting them to shut the hell up.

Such as:
-I remember seeing Dark Water when it opened. I also noticed that some people I knew from junior high (including a girl that I once liked before I found that she liked someone else and that her family were a bunch of totally crazy neo-conservatives) were seeing the movie too. I was kind of hoping that they were as prepared to see this movie as I was (this was one of my most anticipated movies that summer). Turns out, I was wrong. While I was enjoying the movie and respecting the extremely talented cast and the direction of Walter Salles, the other kids were heckling the shit out of the movie as if were a mentally-challenged kid who can't help that he can't talk straight. By the time the movie ended I overheard them talk about how much they hated the movie and when the school year began, I got into it with the girl over the movie but I don't remember how far it got.
-Same thing occurred when I went and saw Darkness but instead of kids I knew, it was a bunch of redneck and emo kids yelling at the screen and laughing at everything that wasn't funny. Finally, I reported them, they shut up and the agitated audience got to watch the rest of the movie in peace.

Been at more movies than i can count where some idiot parents had inappropriate aged children at. Watchmen being only the latest. I consider that only slightly below bringing an infant in a basket to a nice restaurant. If you can afford to go to that restaurant, you can afford a baby sitter.

Haven't figured out what's worse, the person whose cell phone goes off during the movie that A. Takes the call or B. Lets it keep ringing because they're too embarrassed that it's theirs.

Nothing worse than the person sitting next to you texting their buds while the flick is going on.

Another pet peeve are people who believe that because they are speaking a foreign language that somehow no one else can hear them. I can't tell you how many movies I've been at where someone in the theater who doesn't understand English is sitting with someone who is translating what's going on the screen to them in their native toungue. They must just assume that because folks can't understand them that they can't hear them either.

The above kind of happened while we were seeing Milk. A foregin couple was a couple of rows behind us, and you could tell by the level of their voices before the movie started that they were going to be loud talker/translators, but we let it go because sometimes folks like that turn out to be dead silent once the move starts. This proved not to be the case as once the movie started, the translating began. The wife gave them a "Shush" which only caused them to get louder. A few minutes into the movie as Sean Penn and James Franco were having birthday sex, the two of them got up and left. We just assumed that they were offended by the sight of homosexual love. Turns out as we were leaving the theater, we saw them coming out of Defiance. We think they were in the wrong theater.

The Mrs. loves to tell the story of how she went to see The Sixth Sense at a single screen theater. She was in the bathroom before the movie, and in the other two stalls were two other women discussing the end of the movie which totally ruined it for her. She shouted out at both of them that they should shut the hell up as there might be people in here who haven't seen the movie yet!!!!

Well since i am only 16 i dont have any annoying teenager stories. Besides the time one of my buddies screamed throughout Hellboy 2 and said some of the funniest shit ive heard in my entire life.

Back on point i have seen plenty of little kids at movies they shouldnt be at 300,Rambo,Pineapple Express,Superbad,Wanted,Grindhouse just to name a few.

Some funny stories when i saw Disturbia these girls who where around my age would not some saying everything was sketchy which was very obnoxious since they said it proably 400 times from start to finish.

Another one was when some guy who was in 20's got up in the middle of Hot Rod and screamed "This movie is horse shit" and threw a shoe at the screen.

Or the time when i saw Fever Pitch and the projector broke.

The guy throwing his shoe at 'Hot Rod' is awesome Tranny, *lol*

I mostly get annoyed by two things:

1) Couples who show up late to the show and then ask me, who generally arrives 30 minutes early so that I can get whatever seat I want, if I'll move over a seat so that they can sit down. F#@k you. I'm a dick. Sit on either side of me. My mortified date usually makes me move. That doesn't improve my mood.

2) People who kick the back of my seat. It drives me to a level of barely contained psychosis. Inside I'm the Hulk just getting ready to blow. The kind of crazy anger that let's you think you can fight six teenagers. I'd probably win at that point because they've put me in a beserker rage.

I am normally very polite out amongst the humans but I do not need annoyances during movies and this brings out my loudmouthed asshole side.

I went to see The Blair Witch Project on opening night. About 35 minutes into the film a baby starts crying. I am not talking about a 3 year old. I turn around and about 6-8 rows back a 6 month old kid is screaming his head off. When it became obvious that the mother was helpless (being about 18) I stood up, turned towards her and screamed

"Get that fucking kid out of here you stupid cunt! What kind of parent brings a fucking baby to a fucking horror movie?"

She got up and let the theater within 30 seconds.

We then we able to enjoy the movie in relative silence.

The funniest thing (yet horrible) I have ever seen is when I was a teenager. We had a Drive In in my hometown and we were watching a movie. I do not even remember what movie this was. Probably around the time of Lion King or Alladdin in the mid 90s. This Drive In had the speakers on a pole that you place in your window. That leaves the cord running to the pole. My girlfriend at the time and I were having sexual relations (Why did YOU go to the Drive In at 16-18?!) and then there is this horrible thump and the speaker jerks across the barely open window. We both freak out and get dressed in about 5 seconds. I open the door and go around and there is a 6 year old boy lying on the ground crying and choking. This kid had been running around and had clotheslined himself on our speaker wire. He lay on the ground for a couple minutes before he calmed down enough to tell me where his parents car was located. I helped him back there and returned to my car. I don't think we ever finished having sex...

Now that is a bad theater going experience folks.

I can't believe I forgot about this experience:

-I remember going to see Swing Vote in a theatre in Branson. This was a bad experience because the theatre had a whole bunch of old people talking through the movie, even repeating dialogue and being utterly confused at the ending. Meanwhile, these two hambeasts of people walk in after the movie started and sat right in front my mother and I. They smelled really bad, talked throughout the whole movie and even starting clapping to the music in the movie!

After that, I've sworn never to go see a movie in Branson again.

Buscemi wrote: I Swing Vote in a theatre in Branson. This was a bad experience because the theatre had a whole bunch of old people talking through the movie, even repeating dialogue and being utterly confused at the ending.

You mean there are Stupid Old People in Branson. No WAYYY!!!! LOL

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Branson, Missouri, picture Las Vegas. Now take away the alcohol, gambling, and high priced call girls. What you have left is a bunch of overpriced shows and neon lights. That is Branson.

Donte77 wrote:

Buscemi wrote: I Swing Vote in a theatre in Branson. This was a bad experience because the theatre had a whole bunch of old people talking through the movie, even repeating dialogue and being utterly confused at the ending.

You mean there are Stupid Old People in Branson. No WAYYY!!!! LOL

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Branson, Missouri, picture Las Vegas. Now take away the alcohol, gambling, and high priced call girls. What you have left is a bunch of overpriced shows and neon lights. That is Branson.

Next time, try Bronson, Missouri, where "Death Wish" films play from noon to midnight.

"This... ain't over..."

I would watch a Death Wish Marathon with Chuck B.

Well maybe 2 or 3 of them in a row before I started commiting acts of vigilantism...

i had to bring this thread back because i have a hillarious story about my Transformers experience.

Some dude next to me and my friends was clapping repeadtly every time there was an action scene or something funny happened and to boot he knew the mystical robot language and was translating before they translated in the film. The kid was a little odd

Donte77 wrote:

Buscemi wrote: I Swing Vote in a theatre in Branson. This was a bad experience because the theatre had a whole bunch of old people talking through the movie, even repeating dialogue and being utterly confused at the ending.

You mean there are Stupid Old People in Branson. No WAYYY!!!! LOL

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Branson, Missouri, picture Las Vegas. Now take away the alcohol, gambling, and high priced call girls. What you have left is a bunch of overpriced shows and neon lights. That is Branson.

I so want to go to Vegas. We should have the FantaConvention there sometime after this game breaks out and we're all famous millionaires!

In a lighter note, I go to Pigeon Forge, TN, which is like Branson except they have stuff that the non-elderly do.

Some retarded 14 year olds were sitting behind me the 2nd time I went to see Transformers. I thought I'd have to say something, but their comments were mostly pretty funny and true. I'm convinced they're the reason I liked the movie better the second time.

I also saw a mouse when I was walking into the theater. My brother almost shit himself, but since I know that mice inhabit every theater in the country, I just had my feet up during the whole thing.

I have a fear of mice and rats so I try to stay away from really dirty theatres. However, theatres around here are usually well-kept (even the most run-down looking theatre here, the Palace, is well-kept).

Well, all theatres have mice. It's inevitable, no matter how clean or new it is. People just don't see them, they've learned not to be seen.

Thats true Banks. Most of theaters up here are very clean and its the same shit there is still mice it just happens

These are things I don't really want to know guys.